“For more than 60 years, The ‘Lanche was more than a staple to the Marquette community – it was home; the final bar stop; the place where students met the locals and all drank cheap “blues.” When it closed on April 24, 1997, news reports said The Avalanche closed because of problems with rowdy patrons and vandalism, but we know that MU wanted the space for university use. And even though many a professor (and countless former students) will admit to doing a naked beer slide or two in his or her days, The ‘Lanche was just one of those old-school, beer drinking, dingy bars that didn’t fit on the newly spiffed up campus. As the saying goes: “Get your degree at Marquette, but get your education at The ‘Lanche.” – OnMilwaukee.com

The Naked Beer Slide generally occurred close to closing time. Typically, an inebriated individual would remove their clothing while the crowd chanted “SLIDE! SLIDE! SLIDE!” The crowd was also responsible for pouring their cheap beer on the floor, lubricating it for the slider. Easily the most disgusting part was that the slider, upon being soaked in beer and whatever dirt was on the floor, then had to put their clothes back on.

The Naked Beer Slide was mostly performed by men, however, one early morning in June, 1991, a female participated in the ritual. Unfortunately, police were near-by, and issued her and the bar owner tickets. Shortly thereafter, a notice was placed at the front door that Naked Beer Slides were against house rules.

The 'Lanche and Red, White & Blue were synonymous with each other throughout the bar's existence. “Gimme a blue” was all one had to say to be served the “award-winning” brew. Unfortunately, the tradition of slamming bottles of Blue against walls and against the floor was ended in the mid- to late 80's and bottled Blue was available only after being expertly poured into clear plastic cups. Taste aside, the beer's popularity was most likely due to being the cheapest drink in the house. Sadly, the Red, White and Blue Brand is no longer in production.

Remember the old curmudgeon at the end of the bar on the television show, Cheers? Well, The Lanche' had its own curmudgeon and his name was Gordy. Only Gordy wouldn't get up to use the restroom when nature called. Needless to say, he always had a barstool with his name on it.

While owners came and went, the red, lightbulb studded sign always remained the same. When The Lanche' closed in 1997, it was rumored that the sign was stored in the basement of McCormick Hall, however that rumor was untrue. Since its removal it has always been stashed in a storage room in the Facilities Services Building. There is at least one Alumni willing to forgo retirement for this tear inducing piece of nostalgia.

Lines written in Washington DC a few months after graduation.

In DC I stand Too many a mile From where beer is served cold With a slide and a smile.

Instead of loud music And students without books, I'm surrounded by lawyers and political crooks.

I pay too much money, And I can't understand, People here don't socialize With a beer in each hand. Drinks here are imported, They are premium brews, But they don't quench my thirst Like a dozen cold Blues.

Rick isn't here Dressed in tube socks and shorts. Mitch can't be heard Lending wise-ass retorts.

I can't find a Dan Solemnly guarding bar doors, Kicking punks to the street Claiming “This ID ain't yours.”

Where are the foul smells, Sticky floors, plastic cups? The bouncers out here Kick me out if I throw up!

I long to return To that greatest of spots And quaff dirt-cheap beer And drink hideous shots.

How long will it be? What suffers is my condition. I can imagine myself In only one quaint position.

With my elbow on the bar top, A Blue in my hand, Watching people stream into A bar already jammed.

I'm chugging cold beers With my friends, and we all Will continue to drink Until Rick gives last call.

Then we'll hit after-bars, Or walk home for the night, Or go to Real Chili And start a food-fight.

But our thoughts will be tuned To the next time we make haste To the tavern whose misfits Don't feel out-of-place.

I need a night now, I've too much getting and spending. A tap has my name; My sanity's pending.

This drought must surcease, Throw miles to the winds, I can see that red arrow As it slowly descends

Taking me to the door Behind which lies the lair With the solitary table And nary a chair.

My dissonance will end As I enter the place, But my liver will purr At a furious pace.

The night won't cost much; This bar's not out for wealth, But when you enter you Can't be much concerned about health

Since the bathrooms aren't clean, And the air has the smack Of a billowing dark cloud From an industrial smoke-stack.

I will not give two thoughts To fashion or attire; My clothes will repel All the muck and the mire.

Euphoria will be found, No face will be dour. With just a couple of bucks I'll wile away untold hours

With good cheer and fine drink. Contentment is not far From a stool near the tap At the Avalanche Bar.